Tuesday, January 15, 2008
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2 comments:
Very strange pics. Foot in mouth? Did you say something wrong?
hello... just found your blog, & listened to your thoughts on polyamory. it was interesting to me because an acquaintance recently broached the subject with me, going so far as to invite me to coffee to discuss it, bringing me printed information on the subject and encouraging me to consider it. i was flattered that she thought me evolved enough, tho' i don't know that i warrant that sort of confidence. the part when you talked about jealousy, and it being the opportunity for growth was esp. intriguing. but it all makes me think of the quote "love is not for the unformed" (rilke? hesse? i am unsure.). certainly, navigating those waters requires two people to be highly emotionally evolved, secure in themselves. i would think that if jealousy were to rear its head at all, it would likely be pervasive, if both parties were frequently exploring outside connexions, and never mind getting sex into the mix. the emotional attachments alone seem enough to rock the boat.
i guess i'm curious (and i may wonder at it because i still feel i've got room to grow - i'm willing to concede i may not yet be evolved enough to "get it") : why potentially complicate a relationship, possibly exponentially? i value highly my intimate connexions with friends and acquaintances, and i believe there's no one relationship that provides one with all of one's extrinsic emotional needs, and that looking to a significant other to fulfill us completely is most definitely not the answer... but where does one draw the line? should we have to draw the line? i know i've been involved before, and met someone with whom i was interested in exploring something with, but didn't. if i'm interested in exploring something outside, does that mean i'm feeling unfulfilled and am looking for something more? speaking for myself, i have prized certain deeply intimate relationships because they were "special," because of a particular feeling of solidarity i felt with another that is intimate beyond other relationships, even really close ones. does having an open relationship devalue the primary connexion? i am interested in your thoughts.
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